Woof!
The name's Do Dah, Dexy Do Dah, and this weekend I have been involved in some super secret things, so much so I now think I'm a spy dog! It all started when Igaboo wanted to go out, but also wanted to spend time with me, so how do you solve that? Well you sneak me in places I shouldn't be, luckily I'm only little and can fit into many small places!
Firstly I went into London to sniff and snuff around Westminster, those politicians smell fishy to me, I also made friends with a couple of coppers, they were very nice and had a pooch too! Amber was a huge doggie, and very well trained, I had a play with her, well, we made it look like play, but in fact she was divulging some important info on sausages and bones, I will never reveal her secrets! London was good fun and I got snuck into many places where doggies aren't allowed, we got caught once, but I turned on my Dexy charm and we were off for our next adventure!
I've also been practising the art of ambush, o it's such fun! I've been hiding behind my big toys, or behind doors waiting for Igaboo to walk past and then- Dexy Attack! I don't actually attack like a monster, I instead go in for the cuddle, or maybe even the sausage, ahhhh, sausages, if only it was a safe world for them we could all sleep easier at night, but whilst my beloved sausages are in peril I shall search, sniff and snuff them all out and save them....for my belly. I've also been trying out my ambush skills outdoors, especially in long grass, the other park doggies watch me like I'm a weirdo, but they'll be sorry when judgement day comes and they are not prepared as I am. I'm very proud of my ambush skills, I mean, I just disappear into my surroundings, my only question is how does Igaboo always find me? It's not like I'm a bright gold against green, actually, not too sure about that, I'm colour-blind!
Other missions I've been doing is internally monitoring, I've learnt to climb as well as a mountain goat and can get onto the front windowsill, so now when Igaboo goes out on a personal mission without me I can sit and keep guard for any sausage bandits, that's me doing it in the picture, I don't know why Igaboo finds it so funny on her return to see me there, does she not know of the dangers of the world?! She is a bit ditzy and forgetful, maybe the enemy is using mind wipe techniques on her? Maybe that's why she forgets her keys in the door all the time, luckily due to my new advantage point I can alert agent Igaboo to her silly ways, she really must stop doing that or the sausage bandits may get me, not that I'm scared, I'm just only brave behind closed doors!
I also went round a few friends houses and practised my black ops skills there too, managing to open doors and break into other rooms to suss out some sausage munching, when my interviewee refused to concede some sausage, I tried some dirty tactics, sitting on their lap, licking their chin whilst they tried to play a silly computer game, although the game was giving me new ideas, need some camo uniforms and a big gun, but how would I fire it without thumbs? I'll check with intelligence for that, anywho, after clearing their areas I was off back home on the bus, but never relaxing, o no, I kept my eye on everyone on the bus, you never know who could be an agent! On getting home I had to survey the area to find any suspect morsels, none to be found, until I go to inspect my food station and find some yummy pate in my bowl, just a quick check for tampering and it was safely filed away in a secret location (my belly).
This morning I had my latest mission, sneaking into Tesco to have a full English breakfast with Agents Igaboo and Spencer, I got snuck in via a large bag and was hidden under the table and fed sausages and bacon, this was a very important mission, I had heard rumours of a Tesco- Sausage bandit alliance, but due to the taste I think they're alright, it was all going well and to plan until I broke my cover and dived under another table when I saw a piece of sausage fall, could this of been a message to the enemy, or simply carelessness, either way, Dexy Do Dah was on it. Unfortunately blowing my cover meant my other agents needed to evacuate the canteen, exposed identities could be dangerous, on leaving I interrogated those bananas that wear pyjamas that always seem to be loitering outside Tesco, sad to say, they gave me the slip!
That's my secret missions for now, I have a few more to do today, I'm going to a special celebration for other brave people who without them we wouldn't have our country and freedom like we do today, Igaboo's Great Grandfather served in both big wars, and so we are going to investigate a remembrance ceremony, hopefully I'll get some good tips off the real hero's, and I love poppies, mine looks really pretty on my collar. So lets keep all this secret sausage for now, and I'll warn you that this blog biscuit will self destruct in 5 seconds...... not really, the most dangerous thing you have to worry about with me is an ambush of puppy kisses!
Puppy Kisses and Love
Dexy Do Dah Dog
x x x
